FAUX NEWS NETWORK

The most interesting man in the world

1.  WHEN HE'S  PULLED OVER FOR EXCEEDING THE
        LEGAL LIMIT, THEY RAISE THE LEGAL LIMIT

2.   WHEN HE STARES INTO A WOMEN’S EYES SHE SAYS
       “EXCUSE ME MY BREASTS ARE DOWN HERE”
3.   THE ONLY MAN EVER TO MAKE A PROFIT AND HE
        MADE RECORD PROFITS RUNNING A STARBUCKS
        FRANCHISE AT BYU
4.  THE AUCTIONS OFF SIGNED MERCHANDISE BY JESUS
       MOSES AND MOHAMMED NO ONE  QUESTIONS  THE
       AUTHENTICITY
5.   HIS BODY PROCESSES BIG MACS AS HEALTH FOOD
6.  THEY LET HIM DRINK IT AA MEETINGS
7.  THE TSA IS SCREENED BY HIM
8.  THE HIGHEST PRICED HOOKERS IN VEGAS TAKE HIS
      IOU
9.   HE DOESN'T OFTEN DRINK BEER....OBVIOUSLY
      BECAUSE TO BELIEVE  THIS STUFF ABOUT HIMSELF
      HE'S GOT TO BE TOTALLY GOONED OUT OF HIS MIND
      ON HARD LIQUOR