Thursday, May 17, 2007

ON BABBLING BROOKS

    There would be no sense in establishing a “Friend or
Faux Award” until next year, since this year’s has been won before it
could be contested, and that’s because there’s no faux like a nuanced
faux and, with apologies to James Bond’s “The Spy Who Loved Me”, no one
nuance’s it better than David Brooks of the NY Times.  In each of
the next few weeks, we’ll bring you, dear readers, such an example, of
months, sometimes years of Mr. Brooks’ complete sentences in lieu of
complete truths, and then the heartfelt disclaimer of 3 to sometimes as
many as 7 seconds, in duration or even, get this, a part of a sentence.

    One such faux for the ages took place several months
ago on “Meet The Press” during a discussion of the great numbers of
Iraqi’s who have decided that rather than greet us as liberators,
they’ll leave Iraq as emigrators, preferring to live in a refugee camp,
in tents, rather than under our version of non-civil war.  Brooks
allowed that “these people (now over 2,000,000) are not leaving Iraq
because they’re reading the NY Times” (you think), conceding that this
is no (left wing) media creation.  And then Brooks continued, sooo
quickly . . . and sooo quietly . . . that he had bought into that (and
wrote it as well) for some time, and in an instant, the discussion of
so many, many arguments which led but mislead was dismissed and he went
forth to babble-on, in the mid-east, among other places.  More to
follow, from David Brooks, and us.

No comments:

The Faux News Network Principles


A) We distort, you abide
B) Or we retort if you deride, unless we choose not to
C) Complete sentences are acceptable in lieu of complete truths
D) It’s OK to criticize the 2006 Democratic Congress for all America’s problems since 2001
E) We shoot from the flip
F) We’re not always accurate but we’re always certain
G) On what we feel is wrong in this world, we can’t stop people from saying I don’t agree or I don’t care, but we won’t let them say I didn’t know
H) The director’s board has a whim of irony
I) In times of emergency, we should rally around our President: In times of democracy he should do the same for us
J) We proudly plagiarize in advance, examples available upon request
K) It’s easy to be fun-based when you’re fact based
L) Good news parody makes for good news parity
M) And, of course, our goal is and always will be to be the most trusted name in Faux News