REPUBLICAN RESPONSE AND RESPONSIBILITY

Sharron Angle has been playing the tea party “angle”, with positions that are extreme even for her peers and Nevada Republicans. On such things as Medicare, Social Security, veterans affairs, education and other stuff she is even too far right for the Republicans, to the point where a number of them, including Bill Raggio the Republican leader in the State Senate and Dema Guinn the former first lady of Nevada and widow of the Republican Governor at that time are endorsing Harry Reid, they say they will personally vote for Harry Reid’s reelection. Imagine too extreme for the Tea Party and not rich enough to be part of the SPREE Party.

RWJ ALERT, HOLY TOLEDO

Rich Lott is the Republican congressional candidate in Ohio for the 9th District. He has a hobby, and that is that he enjoys being a historical re-enactor. He likes to pretend he is a particular character, and he spend the weekends doing the exercises and imitating what those characters would and did do. So, what’s the rub with his particular obsession/passion as a role player? That’s because of the character he’s played, that of a member of the Nazi SS. That’s right, he likes to wear an SS uniform on the weekend, run around the woods and parade around, and to repeat, he is the current candidate for the 9th District in Congress for Ohio. Oh, shock of shocks, to RWJ (of course that means right wing Jews), he is a Republican. He doesn’t really believe in Nazi ideology, as he explained saying “you have to admire the country of Nazi Germany, a relatively small country compared to the world which militarily accomplished such great things” We wonder just how many Jews will vote for this guy. Some will, because he and they are Republicans, right? Mr. Iott offers that he did his costuming as a father and son bonding thing, and they happily wore SS uniforms together. Some fun. Seems they quit the group some 3 years ago when his son lost interest. He on his website said they did it out of admiration for the bravery of the SS Troops that gave their all so that they can be free. Actually that’s the epitome of a complete sentence as opposed to a complete truth, a trait we at Faux News Network regularly ascribe to the right wing. Mr. Lott pointed out that however unsavory the goals of the Nazis were (you think?) the Nazi SS gave their lives for the country they loved and to be free. The gifted Bill Maher made this complete sentence into a complete truth pointing out they would be “free to kill Jews.” As we always said, conservatives are always better with complete sentences than complete truths. Oh, the 9th district in Ohio includes Toledo, so we say again to RWJs “Holy Toledo look at who your Republican party is backing”.

“REPUBLICAN PROGRESSIVE” KEN MEHLMAN

We have a saying about Republicans and that is they often do become progressive, reasonable, open to change, aware of the world around them, that’s when they stop being Republicans. The latest example; Ken Mehlman, who was George Bush’s campaign manager in ‘04, you remember that campaign with all the anti-gay local agendas in swing states such as Ohio and Florida. Ok, Ken’s out of that now and he had a realization that it was time to let people know he was gay. All right, he said it has taken him “43 years to come to terms with this problem in my life”. But they always come to these terms after their Republican term. And now he is an advocate for gay marriage, now he’s an advocate for reason for discourse, and now he is against labeling and slander and fear because he’s no longer an active Republican. Gees, can these guys go back and talk to their former party members and say, if you’re going to get rational, why not have a legacy? Be rational when you are with the party, so later with the clearest of conscience you can party.

THE NAME IS THE GAME

A couple months ago on Meet The Press, Thomas Friedman stated what might be the golden rule in politics. He said "when you can name an issue you own the issue". Look at how the Republicans have called the inheritance tax the "death tax", and look at the way they have been able to call the womans right to choose "anti life". With regards to health care, what been lacking sorely on the right is frankly a good name from the left. So we thought up a couple choices and they all come down to security. How about the "health security act" or the "American security act" or the "insurance security act". To name it is to claim it and for health care (as will everything in politics) that's the name of the game.

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ORNAMENTAL ARGUMENTS

The Obama administration has been "caught" sending ornaments from previous administrations to school children. And it gets worse; they were red and gold, and the children had to decorate them however they want. The Obama administartion has been accused of "brainwashing" because the only way to really wash a brain thoroughly is letting people do what they want and think on their own, a real cleansing. No worries, however...the right jumped in to save the day. The pointed out the flaws in this Obama scheme. Obviously, letting kids do what they want is brainwashing, and teachers have to drive with these ornaments in their cars which puts them at risk, and yet even more fascinating; in an interview with Samantha Bee, a Republican critic said that due a socialist Obama policy EVERYBODY is getting a present at Christmas time. When Samatha Bee pointed out that Jews have Chanukah, this critic said agreed adding "sure, all 12 days of Jewish Chanukah". You cant make these people up, but sometimes you wish they were made up. Intellectually, these people are kind of ornamental.

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NEWS SHOCKER; RIGHT WING REMARKS ON MEDICARE BASS ACKWARD

The right wing has actually gotten a fact wrong on the health care debate (who would have guessed?). According to the AARP, the Republican remarks that Medicare is going to be cut back in the Obama plan were either mistaken or deliberate lies. There are no recommended cuts in benefits, in fact according to AARP there are major increases in Medicare. Also, the so called "doughnut hole" will be filled and seniors will be able to buy drugs at cheaper prices. This is shocking; who could have thought the Republicans could have been so bass ackward on the health care debate? Could it happen a 2nd time?

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FAHRENHEIT 480

No developed country on earth has a private insurance industry that is so profit driven and so high priced that it eats up such a huge percentage of every dollar that Americans earn. In the last 8 years they have ad a 480% profit, and 20% of their workforce is devoted to denying claims. Its as if 20% of the police or fire departments were devoted to stop the call answering of the other 80%. Why is this sustainable? Well, lets just say for starters they donate heavily to political campaign, and mainly to Republicans. Not to say that other parties are free from their own glitch, as we know that "independent" Joe Lieberman's wife is on the payroll of the insurance industry. For 70 years there has been no major health reform, and the Republicans now claim that they have their own bill with better options (under the "fair as they gotta be" doctrine). We ask, what stopped them from putting together this bill when they had a Republican President, house, and Senate? We answer, its because of the Republican donors, and its burning up the economy!

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HEARD FROM 'DELAY KAY'

Senator Kay Hutchinson (R-TX) has tried to explain away Sen. Dick Durban's assertion that the Republicans have slowed down the debate on the health care reform bill. She said "we just saw the bill Thursday". Obviously. And you never knew what was in it, and you never knew that a health care bill was even coming, huh? Where were the clues Kay? It was in all the papers! We may hear more and more from good 'ole delay Kay.

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FRIDAY FAUXLOSOPHY

What do you think about this quote "Medicare is socialized medicine, soon doctors will be told where they can move and soon they will tell your son where he can work". What kind of radical, fringe and historically wrong politician would come up with this? Well that was Ronald Reagan in 1961. When do they ever get it right? So many people from the left and right agree that once the health care bill gets passed it will become sacred and appreciated. It will become untouchable just like Medicare. The same Medicare the Republicans tried to defeat in the 1960's.

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SAVINGS FROM TORT REFORM? EVEN 1 IS THE PHONIEST NUMBER

Folks we have a new hero and he is Congressman Alan Grayson (D-FL). As you may have heard, in the health care debate in Congress he said the Republican plan is to get sick and die quickly. At least, that's what many people think he said. What he really said was to stay healthy and as a "fallback" if you get sick...then die quickly. He also pointed out that when the Bush people were fighting for tort reform, the sent their own committee to get the facts and prove what Mr. Bush wanted to prove, namely that the amount of the health care dollars wasted by trials for damages according to their figures (with all they could throw in) were 1% of the money spent. Others say it was less that .5%.

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BIGGER TENT, MORE NEED FOR BENT

Will Rogers said (and many of us have repeated) that he was not member of any organized political party, he was a Democrat. That noted, because of the bigger tent the President has to pay the rent for this diversity and cant lead in the smaller more monolithic ideological domain of the Republicans. Its not, per se better or worse (although we feel that for the American people it does prove to be better) just different. A Democratic president has to have a different leadership style than a Republican president.

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IT STICKERED IN MY MIND

On Cape Cod - the land of Obama sticker rock, where the President vacations on Martha’s vineyard – all the cars drive with windows closed tight. It is 95 degrees outside. Then came along one exception and the sticker that stuck. A rambling wreck of a car with windows open (probably because there was no a/c) and her McCain/Palin sticker on her bumber. It made me think; in this land of the well-to-do, this lady couldn’t afford an a/c for her car, which makes us assume she probably can’t afford health insurance either. We respect her right to vote her choice, but this sticker definitely stuck, as we wondered why she would choose that way. We hope she gets a/c sometime, and we hope she has health care all the time.

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SCATTERSHOT FROM THE GRASSLEY KNOLL

Senator Chuck Grassley (R) from Iowa came out with one of the most fascinating admissions about himself, bipartisanship and the Republican party in general. He admitted there might be a health bill passed which had a compromise on the public option which he basically liked and which would do America a lot of good. But he didn’t say he would vote for it, because he would have to convince his Republican colleagues that what he already knows is right is really right. Just one more scattershot from the Grassley knoll.

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SHE DON’T NEED TO BE JANE DOE NO MO’

Yesterday during Senator Al Franken’s debut speaking as a judicial committee member (Al Franken of all people), there was an interruption by a lady named Norman McCorvey. She was formerly known as Jane Roe, as in Roe vs. Wade, the landmark Supreme court decision on abortion in 1973. She has now become an anti-abortion activist, and hey, at age 61 she no longer needs abortion rights. We have often said that one of things that turned many conservatives into liberals was when they were facing draft notices for the Vietnam war, however we forgot to mention that once we pulled out of Vietnam they could then go back to being conservative again. And now Norma McCorvey, who no longer needs abortion rights due to her age, don’t need to be Jane Doe No Mo’.

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JUST TOO MUCH GOVERNMENT...EXCEPT FOR

On health care and among other things, it’s obvious that the right-wing is pointing out, and they claim the American people agree, we just don’t want too much government. Well, you don’t want government intruding your life except when you need the armed forces to protect us, the policemen and firemen to save us, and social security to give us security. What however does that have to do with healthcare? Well there’s a couple of little things, one is called Medicare which covers 45 million Americans. There’s a little thing called Medicaid, which covers 16 million Americans. Does it mean that the right-wingers are against more government? Well, they don’t want our lives to be intruded with, except when they need it. They don’t want government except when it’s necessary; and they don’t want healthcare, or armed forces to help except when they’re needed to help. But they don’t want too much government.

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SENATOR JOHN ENSIGN (CHIEF OF) STAFF INFECTION

Senator John Ensign (R-Nevada) is a big family values guy, and we will show you just how much value he can get for his family. As recently reported, he has been having a long time affair with the wife of his chief of staff. It turns out that rather than bring the affair out into the open, the chief of staff gave Sen. Ensign permission to keep shagging his wife on condition that this family values Senator keep paying the family values mortgage for their nice size Nevada home. So now Sen. Ensign officially has joined the hypocrisy hall, together with Newt Gingrich, Henry Hyde and several others who criticized Bill Clinton for adultery while…uh adultering. When the chief of staff finally tired of selling his wife for the monthly mortgage, he sent a letter to FOX news complaining about the Senators behavior, but surprisingly FOX chose to sit on the letter and not publish or report it, anyone know why? Now this chief of staff is also a supposed big family values Christian, as he once said he would never even be found in a car alone with a strange woman, and that leaves us wondering where he would be found. Finally, during the Clinton scandal, Sen. Ensign publicly called for Clintons impeachment saying that infidelity should force one to resign. Senator, we are waiting…

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ARMED WITH GOOD CREDIT

There is a consumer rights bill to protect credit card holders currently making its way through to Senate. And when all is set and ready to go, Sen Tom Coburn (R- OK) who is one of the reasons why the Republicans are no longer in power, suddenly added an amendment that people should be able to carry loaded weapons into all the national parks. While we are still not sure what this has to do with consumer credit, it seems that for some people every mission in life has to do with guns. Will he also argue for allowing loaded guns on airplanes? or into court? Isnt it interesting that NY which has the strictest gun laws in the country has only 80 gun related murders (not including domestic violence) out of 8 million people in 2007? The numbers for 2008 are due in shortly. So before we do a "slow burn on Coburn" we remind the Republican supporters and enablers of this; The technology and the weaponry is far advanced, but the idea that there will only be Republican or Democratic bullets randomly shot in public places (including national parks) has yet to "go off". Lets also not forget the Brady bill named in honor of the Reagan official who was grazed by a stray bullet and suddenly had a change of heart for gun laws. Now we can slow burn Coburn, and hope he doesnt learn the hard way about random bullets.

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ON THE CHENEY CHANNEL

Many wonder weather the Republican party will bend or break due to the new demographics and social philosophy of the US. We say they are already bent, because when they tolerate Dick Cheney as their spokesman they really tolerate and nourish and negative stereotype about them. In fact, if they cant get that man to go away and they continue listening to his ridiculous tirades about torture, think about the torture that is being leveled upon every well meaning and sensible Republican who has to listen to him.

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ALL VICE ALL THE TIME

Dick Cheney is constantly on the news these days talking about how this country is less safe because of the policies of the Obama administration. The CIA and Al-Qaeda beg to differ, because it seems that Al-Qaeda is now becoign marginalized to smaller areas of Pakistan due to the drone activity provided by the CIA, and they are becoming less and less able to strike the west. In all of 2008 (under Bush) only 16 drone strikes were done and there were 32 already this year. Apparently they have been effective and reduced severely the extremist capabilities. Not to piss off the Pakistanis, but it appears that they and teh extemists are both more frustrated by Obamas successful planning.

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THAT JEW, WHO KNEW

US Senate candidate from Arkansas Kim Hendren recently decided to rally the party faithful with a statement that typically comes from Republicans (sometimes in public and sometimes more private). He reffered to Democratic Senator for NY Chuck Scumer as "that Jew". Mr. Hendren says he regrets usign the term at that meeting, well obviously...because that meeting was accessible. If this keeps up the Republicans will stay 9 short of a minyan for a whole lot longer.

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