Monday, June 23, 2014

They may never be right but they are always sure


Talk show after talk show has Cheney, Wolfowitz, and Chambliss (a classic chicken hawk ) and that whole bunch back with comments on the current Iraqi crisis. Kind of like having a number of doctors who had an extraordinarily large number of their patients die in elective surgical operations that they in fact insisted on, be the ones whom you consulted as to whether to have an operation of your own.

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The Faux News Network Principles


A) We distort, you abide
B) Or we retort if you deride, unless we choose not to
C) Complete sentences are acceptable in lieu of complete truths
D) It’s OK to criticize the 2006 Democratic Congress for all America’s problems since 2001
E) We shoot from the flip
F) We’re not always accurate but we’re always certain
G) On what we feel is wrong in this world, we can’t stop people from saying I don’t agree or I don’t care, but we won’t let them say I didn’t know
H) The director’s board has a whim of irony
I) In times of emergency, we should rally around our President: In times of democracy he should do the same for us
J) We proudly plagiarize in advance, examples available upon request
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L) Good news parody makes for good news parity
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