Sunday, July 6, 2008

HOW CAN WE ALL BECOME WEAPONS OF MASS INSTRUCTION?

These are dangerous times for our country’s security and for the truth, which go hand in hand. Consider then, what if someone told you low key, straight out, that Barack Obama was a Muslim? Well approximately 11% of American holds that opinion, the only problem being that it’s totally erroneous, he is life long Christian. What then to say or do, or not say or not do.

Remember when people including our nation’s administration were telling us that Sadden Hussein and Iraq were responsible for the 9/11 attacks? What did so many of us say or do then? Did we question, did our media?

Get this one gang, on more hand one occasion I’ve been told by college graduates that they find the Comedy Channel Show “The Colbert Report” so much more palatable than Jon Stewart’s “The Daily Show” (Mr. Stewart produces both and both shows are of course political satires) because Mr. Colbert is so much more “reasonable” as in more conservative then Mr. Stewart. They really think that. How to answer?

In the coming election much attention is focused on the candidate’s tax plans. The respected TPC, the Tax Policy Center quoted as authority by conservatives and liberals alike tells us Barack Obama’s tax plan would result in a reduction of 2.7 trillion dollars over the next 10 years and Mr. McCain’s would knock off 3.7 trillion. So when Mr. McCain calls Mr. Obama’s plan the biggest tax increase in history, do you keep a straight face? The differences of course are just who will get what refunds in both men’s plans: which we’ll discuss along the way, but for now lets discuss how we of Faux news can deal with these “fauxs” of the truth.

Take heart, there is hope because when enough so called “liberal” (the main stream news papers and network news sources) continue to say the truths often enough, conservative folks will begin to (have to?) get and even admit it. In fact all the previously mentioned myths were eventually (a key part of the process) acknowledged by people on the right; just reluctantly and softly and when possible just once. Or you might try this one I used when facing an obviously erroneous right wing legend. “Gosh, if the smart folks like you get unfairly tricked, what will have to the rest”? Because many people of good will can be tricked but a few of ill well, and by being weapons of mass instruction, we just might be part of the healing, the healing of the truth.

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The Faux News Network Principles


A) We distort, you abide
B) Or we retort if you deride, unless we choose not to
C) Complete sentences are acceptable in lieu of complete truths
D) It’s OK to criticize the 2006 Democratic Congress for all America’s problems since 2001
E) We shoot from the flip
F) We’re not always accurate but we’re always certain
G) On what we feel is wrong in this world, we can’t stop people from saying I don’t agree or I don’t care, but we won’t let them say I didn’t know
H) The director’s board has a whim of irony
I) In times of emergency, we should rally around our President: In times of democracy he should do the same for us
J) We proudly plagiarize in advance, examples available upon request
K) It’s easy to be fun-based when you’re fact based
L) Good news parody makes for good news parity
M) And, of course, our goal is and always will be to be the most trusted name in Faux News